You stop that silly talk, Corinne!

You are beautiful just the way God made you: a gorgeous, fertile, mass of womanhood. You're probably the feistiest woman George ever set his eyes on. I've never seen him even look at a woman with lust. The other night, when he had that slim apron on, slurping down those noodles to see if they were cooked, and he grabbed you with those matching cartoon crab oven mitts (I love those by the way), and he gave you that huge smack on the lips. Wowzza! I know what I saw, YOUNG LADY! A whole lot of tonguing-!

Oh, hello again, Jimmy! You need another soda already? Cor was just making a big Hoonany about her privates in life, errr...yeah, WHATEVER! Our crazy lives! Enjoy the game. See you soon!

Cor, Jimmy's Dad is getting a divorce. They're already separated, even. Now there's a whole lot of man to shove between your love cushions. The second he said it I felt terrible, but
I jumped to the thought that my little change of life has some benefits! I mean, I wouldn't have to worry about hiding any (what do you call them?) love children or "secret babies" or anything. This box of mine is as barren as the Arctic Tundra! This must be what Horatio feels like when he's a "bottom." No worries! Ugghh! What I wouldn't do for a delicious man like Mr. Matthews for a night. I know, I know. I feel as guilty as the time I gave Black/Latino Comedies a one-star rating on my Netflix account. Thank God Hilary is running for President and not me. On paper, I probably sound like a middle-aged twit who hates the Afro-American community and loves the Gays. Don't get me wrong, I'd vote for Barack in a heartbeat, but I think he's too inexperienced, and Hilary has done so much to break down those glass walls for women so we could get more different jobs...

Anyway, everyone probably knows I'm a little on the dry side when it comes to baby-making at this stage in life. I'm not ashamed. Frankie is being very supportive. And he'd better be. I'd rip his annoying little nose off and feed it to the CAT! Haha! Oh, justing JK-ing.

So, don't talk to me about OLD, missy! You don't know the half of it yet! Wait until your hen house runs out of eggs and then tell me about body issues! It's not just my body though. I feel, um, intellectually that I'm sliding. My Donny comes home everyday One Book Better than his mother. He can hardly even listen to one show I watch without scoffing! That's the mark of a true genius, I think: being so smart that you can't be happy watching TV, you know? Their brains are already churning so fast. I wish I knew how he can study so hard and still manage to be out of the house for hours every night. I tell you! The way my Donny teaches me. For instance: Did you know "disapparate" is not a real word? JK Rowling just MADE IT UP! I'm not sure if I'm OK with someone just making up words. It's seems a little silly. But how did my Donny know? Brilliant.

The game looks like it's wrapping up. Where are you off to after this? A nightclub, you sassy fox?

Cor, you go! Oooowee! It burns just to think-

Oh hi there, Jimmy!

Are you going to buy some raffle tickets or just a little snacky-snack? Oh, a Snickers? Mmmm, I wish there were more nuts in these. I'm partial to Playdates, err, PAYDAYS! Hahah! You want something to wash that down. A soda pop? Oh, A Dr. Pepper? Wow, it's been at yeast a year since I had one of these. There you go Jimmy.

We were talking about our garages, Cor and I! Do you guys have one? Of course you do, you're Dad's a doctor (I just don't want to assume too much because a lot of kids here have the Financial Aids). Anyway, my garage seems to get wider every year! I swear, I can’t even tell you how many cars have squeezed into that dirty little spot of mine! I feel like I'm the only one paying attention to it! I've never seen Mr. Beatty (my husband) help clean it! He hardly goes in it, period! We moved so we could get rid of all that baggage, but instead I just keep feeling like I have to stretch that little backyard addition everyday! And when Donny was born (naturally, god bless my midwife), the garage had to be altered so much it was like they replaced it with one three times as wide! Uggh! The things we do to fit everybody in!

Well, listen to me babble! Here's your change- What? Your Mom and Dad are getting a divorce? Oh. He lives in an apartment now. Hardly a garage at all...I'm sure someone will- I see. Well, I'm so sorry. Enjoy the rest of the game...Bye, bye now.

Corinne, you OK sweetie? I was getting a hot flash just now as you walked up here. How was the bathroom? Do you need anything? I think I might have some Monistat in my bag...